He'll Be Remembered
by dancerbaby414
Summary: A story of a girl growing up in Hogwarts. Life, and her best friend, throw her twists and turns she thinks she can't get past, but does the death of a friend help her find happiness? Or will she forever be unhappy with what was dealt to her. Mfor lang


Were you ever not so secretly in love with your best friend? I was. We met when I arrived at Hogwarts. We were _not_ instant friends. I was… still am actually… loud, outlandish, and I wanted to be friends with everyone. I was one of the smarter kids in my year. I did well for myself, but I knew what was too much for me to handle. Especially since I was on the Quidditch team.

He was… different. Okay, he was flat out, no lie, a dork. Swear to Merlin, he spoke in code. He didn't want to be friends with anyone, let along a girl. He was a fricking genius, and he made sure we all knew it.

"Hey, I'm really sorry to bother you, but –"

"Then don't."

"Well, I was jut hoping you could explain what Professor Sinastra was saying today…"

"No. I can't."

"You didn't get it either? Thank, Merlin. I thought I was the only one!"

"You are. I just don't want to help you."

Needless to say, I was just a smidge pissed. Considering I was only eleven, and I liked a challenge, I made it my mission to marry Kyle Francis Jamieson.

In less than two months, we could quietly do our homework… near each other, without insults. Although, we did argue a lot. In actuality I was just as intelligent as Kyle. I just chose to do other things than take every class you could possibly take at Hogwarts.

Soon he realized that I could hold my own in arguments and in my intelligence. I could potentially be an equal to him. Key word: potentially. Remember that later.

Over the summer after our first year, I invited him to my house a few times to hang out, do summer homework, whatever. He refused. Stubborn bastard. But by Christmas of second year, I could publically state that we were friends and soon we were besties. I even expanded his friendship circle. Kyle became loads more tolerant of our less intelligent friends.

It was our fourth year when the Triwizard Tournament came to Hogwarts. I was too terrified to enter even if I had been old enough. I act all tough, but really I'm a big, fat chicken. He was glad he wasn't old enough to enter. He scoffed at physical activity.

"I don't get it. It's just sweaty and gross."

"It's fun!"

"Fun. I don't need fun. I'm going to learn Mandarin Chinese."

"Quidditch is so much cooler than learning Chinese."

"_Mandarin_ Chinese."

I just rolled my eyes.

"Physical fitness gets you no where in the real world."

"Neither does Mandarin Chinese."

For the record. Both us: wrong. He wasn't the only guy I ever talked to, but since about third year when he started saying 'Thank you.' to me for doing stuff, I fell in love. I tried not to like him. Honest. But the seven other guys I attempted to date didn't help. They consisted of one complete idiot, one kid who looked like a turtle (kind of smelled like one too), one that made me feel like a pedophile, one that cheated, one that gave me a poem for my birthday that he wrote for someone else, one who was literally fourteen inches taller than me (and a stoner), and one who moved WAY too fast.

The one who moved way too fast, he had a party at which he attempted to grope me, repeatedly, in front of everyone! I hid in the bathroom. He waited outside. CREEPER!

I guess I should explain why I like him so much. Kyle… Kyle was smart, funny, and generally a good friend. Once he grew up a little, he was a really big help to me when I was overwhelmed with homework and Quidditch, especially when my mom died. We never actually talked about her death. That was too deep for Kyle to talk about, but he knew when I was upset or on overload with all my work. He turned into someone I could count on, even if I counted on him calling me a shithead. At least he treated me the same after my mom died unlike everyone else who thought I was just going to implode or something.

"Derek, that's so stupid!"

"Shut up, you mom is stupid!"

GASP! It wasn't me. It was the forty girls surrounding me who all gasped.

"Oh, Merlin. I'm so sorry... I didn't mean…"

"I know you didn't. It's no big deal, Derek, really."

Apparently, when I said things like that, I automatically must be lying. Kyle didn't treat me any different.

"You are a complete fucking asshole."

"What did I do now, Kyle?"

"You borrowed my Potions book and got CHEESE on it."

"No, I didn't."

"Don't lie. You totally did, Shithead."

"I didn't, Assmonkey."

"Fine!"

"Fine."

Anyway, so the Yule Ball. It took me three weeks, begging, groveling, bribery, threats, and a promise to leave him alone until next Christmas for my best friend to be my date.

"You can at least pretend you aren't repulsed by the site of me."

"You could pretend you didn't drag me here kicking and screaming."

Glare off. I won. I always do. Maybe it's because I have boobs and totally use them to my advantage. No guy can't look if you touch your own boobs. Seriously.

I then proceeded to make him dance. A slow song came on, and I put my hands on his neck and played with his hair. He stood uncomfortably with his hands on my waist. WAIST! Not hips. Waist. I took a step closer and swallowed. Now or never.

"I like you."

Silence. Deafening. No, not the Weird Sisters. The really awkward silence thing that totally happened was deafening.

"Come on!" I punched him. God, I am such a man. "It's not like it's a surprise. I tell you all the time that we're going to get married. You even agreed! That one time…" Don't cry, don't bloody cry.

"To shut you up!" Liar.

"Fine." Quiet. "You want to make out?" DID I JUST SAY THAT?!

"Excuse me?" Fuck. Fuck. Fuckitty fuck fuck.

We didn't make out. We barely even talked the rest of the night. At midnight, my other friend, Katie, and her date, Steve, invited me and my date (HA!) to some party hidden somewhere in the castle.

"Yes!" "No!" Guess which one of answered which way.

"I'm going to bed." He walked away. Jerk.

Suddenly, Steve's best friend, Anthony, appeared next to me. He was going to the party. Our respective friends skipped off ahead of us. He offered me his arm. Shocked at chivalry coming from a guy, I accepted quickly. We talked all the way to the party. Somehow, by the time we got there his arm was around my waist. I guess it didn't bother me.

This is the part of my story where I tell you about my alcohol tolerance. It's none. That is all.

Three butterbeers later, I was tipsy. Anthony was glad. We were on an armchair. Me in his lap. He was playing with my fingers, and I was enjoying pretending that he was someone else. I yawned. He pulled me so I was leaning my back against his chest. His hands moved to playing with the bottom of my dress which wasn't at my knees, which I vaguely remembered it being that length before. Whatever. I had gotten the ultimate rejection tonight. I was going to be a floozy if I wanted to. And I wanted to.

I would have given my virginity to that kid… Anthony was it?... if I thought it would help me forget. I knew better. Even in my drunken stupor, I knew better. I guess he realized he wasn't popping my cherry at about the same time as me and lamely ditched me. Whatever. At least I didn't care about him.

Three weeks later, after my awkward birthday celebration, the love of my life and I were back to best friends. Now that I had been rejected by Kyle and I hated my entire being anyway, I figured what the fuck? Might as well give it everything I've got.

It was more than a year later. Spring time during our fifth year. We were all on edge with O.W.L.'s coming up. I, however, was oddly blasé. Whatever. I could just marry someone rich if I did badly.

"I like you."

"I know."

"I know you know."

"Then why do you tell me everyday, for the past year!"

"Because it's true."

"If you keep it to yourself, it doesn't make it any less true!"

"If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?"

"What?"

"Never mind."

Over the summer, I learned of my O.W.L. scores. I did awesome… I didn't _have_ to marry someone rich after all. But maybe I still would. Daddy was bringing me to King's Cross that day. First day of my sixth year. Thankfully, I convinced him to leave dearest Step-mommy at home. Stupid bint.

"Hold my hand."

"Why?"

"Because I asked you to."

"Why?"

"Because I want you to."

"Why?"

"Because I want to –"

He grabbed my hand. Perfect fit.

Six months passed. They were good months. They passed with hand holding, special smiles, inside jokes, dirty jokes. Wait… they were jokes… right?

They had to be jokes. He knew I wasn't expecting a relationship from him.

"Are you going out?" Katie asked us as we walked by, hand-in-hand.

"No." I said it. Not him. Me.

What the fucking hell is that about? Did he not answer because he wants to go out? Does he like me? Has my entire existence not been a waste?

Yea. It had been.

Whenever we held hands, he always played with my ring.

"Why do you always play with my ring?" Valid question.

"I don't know. What? No one else does?"

"No –"

"What? It's not like you aren't always surrounded by other guys. It's not like you could possibly still be a virgin!" Screamed. He screamed it down the corridor. Everyone looked at me. I know him. It was a joke. A really bad joke.

He laughed. I stopped walking. Our hands pulled apart. I allowed one tear so he felt guilty before I wiped it away.

"I'll try not to give you herpes, then." I walked away. Forever.

Okay. I lied. But after spending three fucking years thinking that you found someone amazing, thinking you'll date, thinking he'll ask you to marry him, mother his children, how do you just walk away? You can't.

So two weeks later. We were back to holding hands. That's when he started his 'the world is inferior to me' crap again. Whatever. I was used to it, even when his remarks stung a little.

It was a week after school had ended and I decided to get a head start on my summer work. I had a question on one of the essays we had to write. For some reason, I couldn't find where our assignment said how long it had to be. So, I owled him. Twenty minutes later my owl returned.

WE ALL KNOW YOU ARE SUPERIOR BECAUSE YOU STARTED YOUR SUMMER WORK ALREADY. BRAVA. YOU CAN STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO.

_Jerk, I seriously had a question. Whatever._

YOU ARE JUST MAD BECAUSE I WON'T GO OUT WITH YOU.

_Excuse me? NO! You can't say that. You have always known exactly how I felt about you. I never lead you on. I __**never**__ pressured you for a relationship. I was FINE with whatever we had. You are the one who didn't know what he wanted, or had the balls to tell me. And __**you**__ are the one who just freaked out at me for no reason!_

I HAVE NOT LEAD YOU ON!

_We were fucking holding hands when you screamed I wasn't a virgin in the corridor. Which by the way, I am SO a virgin. You are so insanely ridiculous. I can't deal with your petty bullshit anymore. Don't talk to me until you've grown up. You repulse me right now._

That one was forever. Really. I'm not lying. That summer I met up with my old Muggle friend who lived in my neighborhood. She had a lot of cute Muggle guy friends. I had a lot of cute Muggle clothes Step-mommy had bought for me.

It was a good summer. Oddly refreshing considering the utter turmoil that was happening around us.

We met at the Battle at Hogwarts. We saw Colin Creevey get killed.

I was crying. I couldn't hold it back in the still life or death situation. Arms wrapped around me.

"Colin was a good kid. God, I haven't seen him since he was… thirteen? He grew up into a great man. He'll be remembered." The accented voice was soothing.

"He… he…" I couldn't get it out. "He pushed me out of the way."

Oliver Wood turned out to be my savior that day. I couldn't let go of his hand. It was somehow keeping my feet on the ground. His calloused hand was real to me when nothing else was.

Kyle? You ask. Not a Death Eater by surprise, don't worry. Not one of the many killed. Underage. Couldn't fight. I have no idea if he tried to stay behind or not, but he did not fight that battle.

"Take it easy, okay, love?" He's amazing. "You know I worry."

"How can you worry when a bludger is smashing in your skull?"

"That only happened once, and it was before we were married!"

I rolled my eyes at him. All I was doing was going dress shopping for my surprise baby shower! Oops! That I didn't know about.

"Oh gosh! Sorry, I didn't see you there!"

I laughed. "I don't know how. I'm as big as a – holy mother… Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas?" Kyle asked. Yea. That's right. Kyle.

"Little ears." I said placing my hands on my protruding stomach.

He just nodded.

"It's been a long time." I said.

"Yea, it has… You're pregnant."

"I am." I smiled because that's what happy peopled do! "I'm due in three months!"

"Wow." Always lacked enthusiasm, he did. "Your husband must be thrilled."

He is totally fishing for personal information! "Yep! Oliver already bought a little broom for the baby."

"Oliver? Oliver Wood?" Kyle looked like he was about to shit his pants.

"That's the one."

"Wow!" There was the emotion. "I had no idea."

I laughed once more. "Oliver's more into coaching now. Our marriage was never really publicized."

"Well, congratulations." He opened his arms.

He wanted a hug? Okay… weird. Most awkward hug ever. And I've hugged trees as well as an oven once… don't ask.

I opened my mouth to say my goodbyes when –.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry? For what?" I was confused.

"For leading you on. For not having the balls to tell you that every time I held your hand I never wanted to let go."

TOTAL SHOCKER.

"I know it's too little, too late." He looked so sad.

"Yes. It is." Hey! Why should I care if he's sad? "I really have to go."

"Yea. Yea. Congratulations… again."

"Thanks…" POOF! I was gone.

"How was your day, babe?"

"Weird."

"Weird good or bad?"

"Weird it was really awkward, but I realized that the past is behind me and… it's not coming back to slap me in the ass because I have you. I love you."

"I love you, too, but remember…"

"Little ears." We said it at the same time.


End file.
